For me sex was a cocktail which included a shot of Dan and a shot of Shame.But since my husbands death, all that had been forgotten: until Dan had came to stay with us.While I stare into the darkness of the window I become aware of the reflection that’ s before me; of the two of them on the floor behind me. I smile at the quirk of it, like watching a hidden camera. Jez is squirming on the floor underneath Dan.Kneeling over her, he’s tickling her first on the neck then the waist. She’s in convulsions, legs kicking out against the delightful torture, her white thighs flashing, her school dress skewed up past her knickers.The tickling fingers work from her waist down into her thighs and suddenly I’m transfixed; my heartbeat is the only sound I’m aware of.I watch his finger stroking slowly over her thighs and into the crouch of her knickers.Now she’s ceased squirming; she’s motionless.As her thighs begin parting, her brown eyes, shaded with uncertainty yet knowing, lift to meet Dan’s. I didn’t get a chance to ask Gabby how she knew him before I had his brains as part of stuffed baked potato.” I explained.“Call me if you think of anything,” she said giving me her card.“Okay, but I’m not going to think of anything,” I said.“By the way did you know Edward Gaines from your day in the state pen?”she asked.“Yes I did,” I admitted only because it was well documented.“Why did he commit suicide,” She asked.“I have no idea,” I said.“He hung himself in the cell next to yours didn’t he?” she asked.“You obviously know that he did. Before you ask I have no idea why he did it either,” I said.“You didn’t by any chance encourage him to do it did you?” She asked.“No, but I don’t think anyone encouraged him to do anything,” I replied.“Did you join in on the beating earlier that day?” she asked.“No, as you can tell I didn’t have any kids, so the fact he was a child rapist had no special significance to me,” I explained. “Tell Sylvia next time to come herself to ask her dumb shit.
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